Only in America, huh?

Cheese!

Me in front of the Gulf of Mexico, with a (fake) cheesy smile. Oh and if you happen to discover what's wrong with the picture, yes I already know about that dammit!

If you'd like to view ALL (shared) Texas 2009 pictures, please refer to the "My Photo Albums" in the sidebar, or alternatively, click here, here and here.

Hello everybody. This is me speaking here, safely back in the Netherlands. This time I have survived a flight of more than 10 hours (it was a bit more relaxed this time - better service and two empty seats next to me!), 9 hours of waiting in London Heathrow (booooring), a one and a half flight to Amsterdam (tiring...) and a border baggage check.

Speaking of the border baggage check: haha, that was funny! The customs and border protection guy just HAD to take me out for inspection of an entire airplane. The reason why I think he took me was because I was wearing my Halo cap the American way (facing down at 150 degrees) and sunglasses indoors (yes - it's stupid, but it was part of my big re-entry). The first thing he was, was surprised about the fact I had a gentle voice and was nice. You could see his attitude change when I started talking more. He asked me something: "Do you have anything to declare?" I replied with: "What am I supposed to declare then?" He gave me a couple of examples: "Cigarettes, alcohol..." Me: "Oh no I don't have anything like that..." He already picked me out of all the people on the plane, so he wanted to finish the job. He asked me to come with him and I did.
He opened the first side pocket... The first thing he picked out of the side pocket was a zip line bag with dirty underwear in it. You'd think he could expect that, but his face was frowning anyway. He continued to check the side-pocket rather quickly and closed it just as quickly. He opened the other side pocket. In that pocket I had my manga. His first response was "Comic books... or manga, whatever they call it nowadays." My first response, seeing how the mangas were ruined because of the travelling, was: "Oh, would you look at those ruined covers...". He scrolled through one of the books to check if there wasn't any contraband hidden in it... I'm sure he noticed it was all about bunnies and stuff - because once again his face started frowning. He decided not to check the other two books and opened the main bag, he took out my jeans (without inspecting any pockets or whatever) and put them on the table carefully so they didn't unfold. Within a couple of seconds he mumbled "Powerpuff Girls... uhmm" and took Bubbles' head half out of the bag. He looked at me for a short bit and started checking again, seconds later though (without moving anything) he put my jeans back in and mumbled "No-one has to see this" and gave me back my luggage. Guess I wasn't as tough and American as I looked from the outside with that Halo cap and sunglasses, am I right marines?

Texas sure was one hell of an experience I will not forget soon. Even the way back home was an experience by itself... Gosh how I'm going to miss that lifestyle for a bit.

Anyway - This blog article was about the "What the-" moments in America. These moments were the moments that attracted my attention in a ridiculous way. In most of these situations I immediately started comparing America with the oh-so-brilliant Europe. Let the list start:

- Texan traffic rules & drive style
Texan traffic rules are scary. If you stop at a red light and you want to turn right - you can do that whenever the coast is clear even if the light is red. Uhm... WHY? Sorry, by clear I meant clear enough... So every time a car passes and there is a big enough hole between that car and the next one, you can start gunning hoping to keep up with the car in front of you driving 40 miles an hour before getting smashed by the car coming straight at you at 40 miles an hour not paying attention because his bloody traffic sign is green!
Not just that, but there is a policy on Texan roads. Because there are stop signs at almost every bloody intersection (stop signs mean you are OBLIGED to stop - just as in Europe), the policy is "first stopped, first go", no "coming from right takes the precedence", so when you're driving straight on an intersection you'd better watch out because the people from the left might've braked earlier and WILL start driving when they see you slowing down. This might work, if the car that's driving and you are actually slowing down to STOP.
You know what's even worse than all those intersections with the obligating stop signs? The ones without. Holy shit you'd better watch where your driving because you'd better be sure that when you're earlier at the intersection (or driving way faster), the other cars are going to stop for you and vice versa. The first to come can continue driving, the others have to stop.
The mixed intersections are "fun" as well. For example the ones with the T-intersections. The car driving down the road that ends has to stop. Sure, sounds like a plan... But then you can have to problems: The first problem you can face is the same as the traffic lights, drive whenever you can but make sure you won't get bashed by the cars that don't have to stop, and the other problem is the cars that are heading to your road. This is a problem when for instance - The cars don't have their blinkers on, you'll never know that you're able to turn because you think he just slows to let you pass but you're not sure so you HAVE to wait for them taking the turn... and when the cars DO have their blinkers on because you're never sure they will actually turn or they decide they'll go straight anyway why speeding so you HAVE to wait for them taking the turn... Confusing? God yes. And dangerous as well, especially if you realise 16 years old can drive cars too. And trust me, the distances in the USA are so big, when you're 16 you HAVE to drive a car or HAVE to be driven by yomamma everyday to get where you want...

I just realised there was another thing that bothered me during the drives in America. In Texas, you're allowed to call while driving, not only hands free! I find that dangerous. It distracts you from what's in front of you. What's even more annoying though is, is the front-seat/back-seat talk or the fiddling with the dashboard. DO NOT turn your head away from the road while driving... PLEASE! You might just hit that bouncy part in the road with full-speed and BASH into the car in front of you because you haven't paid attention... I mean, seriously!

And there's another thing I just realised I can't get a grip on. Why are you allowed to overtake vehicles both on the left and right side of the vehicle? Why aren't you limited to overtaking them left (using the faster lane)? In the Netherlands we drive at the right of the road, meaning all the exits on our highways are at the right side as well. If you happen to drive in Europe, you mostly have not to worry about being overtaken in the slower lane. This makes it safe for vehicles that are in the speed lane to change lanes to the right rather quickly so they're able to hit the exit. In America however you'll ALWAYS have to check your rear-mirror to make sure there aren't any speeding vehicles to your right that will be overtaking you shortly. This sounds more dangerous to me. I wouldn't like being overtaken by cars on the slower lanes.

- American/Texan roads
One of the first things I noticed driving on Texan roads was the fact they were really... bouncy. Gosh when you're used to the European roads you can just feel your food going the wrong way once on American roads. You'd think it's just a matter of getting used to, well, you're wrong. This was NOT just something to get used to, because during my entire stay we drove a lot and the rides didn't get more comfortable as the days passed, not even mentally...
Then there's another couple of things about American roads: there's a lot of 'em, they're grey and the lay-outs are confusing. Absolutely not something I want to drive on, but had to because the distances were too big to cycle (and the weather was too hot).

- American cars
Not done yet roasting the American traffic circus. The first thing that attracted my attention when I landed were the American cars being parked and driven all over the Houston airport. No wait, that's a lie, the first thing that attracted my attention was the heat.
Anyway... continuing with the roasting of the American cars... They're all the same couple of colours, white, black or something in between (booooring), there's a shitload of trucks and the cars in Texas all look old and dirty.
But that's not all. The place where I was at featured little Japanese (and even less European) cars, only leaving room for the killermachines America produces. Quite frankly, the American cars aren't safe if you compare them to European cars. Moreover, they're not even safe for American women! Chris' mother told me that if she would get in an accident, the seatbelt would break the spines in her neck and the airbag would finish the job this because she's so "damn small".

- Free soft-drink refills
I wish we had those in Europe... goooosh! It's funny how in America, the cups you get if you order something are size large anyway if you compare them to European cups... but the fact that in most restaurants you can have as much of the soft drink you ordered, is just plain awesome! I found that out the fourth day or so when we went to Wal-mart and ordered food and drinks at the McDonalds in the same building. When walking towards an empty table somewhere in the back, I noticed the soft- drink machines were in reach of the consumers. I told Chris the following: "Hey, the machines over there are placed really dumb... anyone can fill-up his cup whenever the employees aren't looking! Now that's funny!" Chris was all like... "What the-? That's the purpose of 'em, you can refill as much
Another small detail is the fact that everywhere you go, you can ask for water. Ordering water in restaurants is always free of charge and you get the water in cups as well. The machines to refill as much as you like here, it's free!" "I was like... Wow, that's not like in Europe... I wish we had that." Chris explained: "Companies like McDonalds order so much soft-drinks at the same time they pay so little for it they can give you free refills without losing profit, I mean... drinks are the cheapest part of a meal." Now that's quite something.
Also - If you order water, get it in a cup and refill the cup with Dr Pepper... you just got yourself free soft drinks, w00t! Not that I did it or anything, I mean... one full cup of soft drinks/water is already hard to completely drink, but another one after that would be too much to handle! Chris' reply when I told him that brilliant scheme: "You cold do that yes, but most Americans aren't bastards like that - that's just rude." I guess it's just me with my greedy Dutch way of thinking, now isn't it?

"Ifar has been here for a couple of days now and the most exciting thing he found out about America is the free refills..."

Chris, Texas.

- Ice-tea, sweet tea and tea
One of the biggest points of discussion was the confusing things the Texans all call tea. I mean... what the hell is up with "sweet tea"? The first time I drank sweet tea, the sweet tea did NOT taste like tea at all. In fact, it didn't taste like tea so much that I thought it was much like the European ice tea (which doesn't taste like tea either). At that time I started yelling "Sweet tea is not TEA" Apparently Chris did not like that, because immediately he went into defensive mode. During my entire stay that discussion has been held more than once. In all honesty, that discussion had been held SO much that it even started to annoy Chris!
Anyway, I think I got it all figured out now: In Europe, sweet tea does not exist, it's called ice tea here (and is waaay less sweet). In Texas, sweet tea is like ice tea with a lot (and I mean A LOT) of sugar added. It's similar to ice tea, but way sweeter, and doesn't taste like ice tea at all... so that's why I didn't call it tea in the first place, just how I don't call ice tea actual tea. Also, in Texas ice tea is in fact, plain ice-cold tea. Disgusting! I mean, who would want to drink cold tea anyway?

"Sweet tea is a southern US thing, they dont have that in the north. I call it sugar water. In the north, they have ice tea which is good, like raspberry or peach tea."

Nacht, WLM on August 14, 2009

Another cold drink that struck me amazed was ice coffee. It is exactly what it's called after, cold Starbucks coffee, available in a lot of the supermarkets. Honestly, thank God we have nothing alike in the Netherlands as far as I know. I cannot imagine it becoming a hit - it's revolting.

- The toilet paper
Yes, another point I'd like to discuss with y'all (Y'ALL, Y'ALL, Y'ALL, Y'ALL, Y'ALL) is the toilet paper in America. Currently you're probably all like "What The-", but I can tell you I had the exact same feeling when I confronted myself with it the first time during my stay. The American and European pieces of toilet paper seriously have different dimensions. In Europe, the height of every piece of toilet paper is way larger than the American height. Over in America, the pieces of toilet paper are perhaps half as big as the European when you rip it off the roll. This was weird. During my stay, instead of folding TWO toilet papers as I normally would in Europe, I had to fold FOUR of 'em - two on each side. Bloody ridiculous!
But that's not even all! In restaurants and fast-food buildings there are NO RIP-OFF lines on toilet paper, so every time you try to rip some off you don't rip off a square or a rectangular, but more like half a circle... you CAN NOT wipe your butt with toilet paper in the shape half of a circle! ARRG!

- Costs studying in America
Another surprising fact I taught during my stay in Texas were the ridiculously high price tags of studying in America. Everybody knows we Europeans normally think of American teenagers to be dumb, and now I have a slight idea why that is. Apparently, in order to let someone go to high school for a year, it costs the parents ten thousands of dollars to get everything settled! I mean... WOW. Just... wow. In Europe (there we have the comparisons again), a year of college costs about 2,000 Euros. In Europe, or more specifically the Netherlands, about 70% of the people have had/will have a diploma of college. In fact, most of the parents/the students themselves in the Netherlands can afford their college bills. I can imagine that, with the high price tags in America, a lot of the families don't have enough money for the young ones to go to school.
The best thing... it's good for me to understand this, but that doesn't make the average teenager in America any smarter. There are still plenty of BabiiCandiis (mirror) spread around America because they... oh wait... BabiiCandii is from a rich family... uhm... I guess there's still plenty of more reasons why teenagers are dumb in America. Moving on.

- School dress codes/regulations
Next up... the school dress codes/regulations. This time I'll be going straight-to-the-point: they're hidious. I mean, I've heard of uniforms (I'm pro uniform) before, but strict dress codes like the ones they have at the school Chris is going to? In fact, there were so many I forgot most of 'em and can only tell a couple. For instance, the clothes have to be either brown, tinted, black or white (grey is not permitted!), there can not be any logo bigger than SMALLxSMALL inch (another damn thing about America... the tools for measurement are all different) or are allowed to be really big as long as the clothes say Alvin or has the mascot in it, meaning gay-ass cheerleader shirts are permitted everywhere at school... the button-up shirts must have a collar, kids cannot go off-campus during school times and will receive heavy penalties if they're caught outside the school premisses...
I mean... what the hell is up with all that...? I can't imagine rules like that would be accepted at Dutch public schools. Is the criminality/wannabe criminality that much of a problem to make school prison-like?! I guess it's just practising before the kids run out of money and become drug dealers, winding up in prison - at least they know what the prison is like already. PS: Ratting in the Netherlands will NOT give you a reward whatsoever!

- Tax free prices
Something a little more peculiar. The first time I went shopping in America, a lot of products had weird price tags on them: $4,77... $2,82... $1,89... Apparently, the price tags in stores in America are all excluding the taxes, I found this weird. Over at the Netherlands, all the prices are including taxes. At the time I found out I started laughing out loud. Why would it be like that in America? Chris told me it was a normal thing to have. I disagreed... and after he told me, I still laughed at the tax free price tags several times.
After awhile though I figured out the explanation. America is a big country with 50 different states, all with different rules and laws. In fact, it is so big that the taxes are a local thing! To put the price tags of nationwide products INCLUDING taxes would automatically make those products more expensive somewhere where the taxes are higher than in a place where the taxes are low. By putting all the price tags excluding taxes will keep something nationwide the same price everywhere. You pay taxes at the end of your shopping, at the counter. There your taxes will be added to make the difference.
In fact, by figuring that out, I also found out why new console games are all $59,99 in stores in America, because even in those commercials, the prices are excluding tag, making them about $64,94 with taxes in the Houston area... almost the same number in EUROS we pay over in Europe.
Oh by the way, by knowing the explanation now, it doesn't make me less laughy about it though! I still find it weird to see price tags excluding taxes.

- American brainwashing
Probably not the actual last thing, but the last thing I can come up with that bugged me about the American lifestyle was the continuing brainwashing an average American has to withstand during a regular day. It is not a secret to say they're being screwed daily. For instance: the American advertisements on the telly are purely to psyche you into believing the products that are offered actually work. Every single commercial is someone introducing himself as an expert, followed by him or her talking about the product and telling it's why it's so great... but don't just take their word on it! Listen to the happy customers they certainly did not hire you to talk! Another instance: shopping. While in Europe you get one big bag to put all your groceries in, in America they have these tiny little bags in which you can only put three or less articles in. So instead of leaving with one big bag, you're supposed to leave the store with this great feeling you bought a lot of crap because you have ten small bags!
That's probably just a beginning! I mean I'm sure there are plenty of other ways they're probably screwing the American people over, but I only noticed those two ways the worst.

That was a lot to read now, wasn't it?! Enough about America - It was a great experience and the boxxy full of stroopwafels and liquorice (containing the photo card and post card) is on it's way. I hope you enjoyed the flowers.

Also by finishing this very, very long blog article I'd like to notify you guys I'll be taking a break of writing articles for a couple of days because of me wanting to enjoy my holidays for the rest of the little time I have left. This will result in that I won't be writing a specific blog article about the trip to the cinema I have planned in a couple of days. I'll write a short summary about it at the end of the holidays.

The flowers Chris' family has received from us.

Cheers,